Category: Connecting

  • Red Flags or Revelation? Learning to Trust Your Inner Wisdom in Love

    Red Flags or Revelation? Learning to Trust Your Inner Wisdom in Love

    In dating and intimacy, we’re often taught to look for surface-level markers of “worthiness” — titles, income, lifestyle, social status. But the deeper truth is this:

    A person can look impressive and still live in quiet chaos.

    And the more mature version of you doesn’t need to investigate someone’s outer life to understand their inner world.

    You don’t have to figure out how much someone makes to know whether they are emotionally whole.

    What matters more are quieter, more honest questions:

    Is their life stable — emotionally, spiritually, relationally?

    Does their story match their choices?

    Do you feel safe, calm, and clear in their presence — or confused, tense, and unsettled?

    These questions don’t come from judgment.

    They come from wisdom.

    You’re not “too sensitive.”

    You’re perceptive.

    When something feels off, it isn’t an accusation.

    It’s information.

    Your body notices before your mind catches up.

    Your spirit recognizes misalignment long before you can explain it.

    And trusting yourself doesn’t make you cynical — it makes you grounded.

    Quiet clarity is powerful.

    You don’t have to argue with your instincts.

    You don’t have to convince yourself to stay curious about red flags.

    You don’t have to silence your nervous system to be “open-minded.”

    You are allowed to listen to the discomfort.

    You are allowed to honor the pause.

    You are allowed to choose peace over potential.

    Emotional intelligence in love looks like this:

    Peace without performance.

    Consistency without chasing.

    Safety without forcing.

    And spiritual maturity shows up as discernment — not paranoia.

    You are not rejecting people.

    You are protecting your peace.

    And that is holy.

    I pray this Sunday you focused on what you need and that you know that your wants (no matter how big) are divinely aligned. May peace be your stand and hope your anchor. You are worth your healing work. 💕

    Be brave,

    Michelle🌿

    ©️Intimately Worded, Michelle.

  • Sunday’s Writing

    Sunday’s Writing

    #SuperSundays: I used a gift card I won through a health app and treated myself to Starbucks this morning. I walked in, minding my business, and they handed me a free Red Cup for being a regular coffee consumer. A small, unexpected kindness. A wink from God. #WinWin 🤓

    The Tribe… they were all here this weekend.

    • Autumn fussed about my eating—and my not eating—habits. 🥰 A full Tillman. When she “moms” me, I hear Pearlie Mae, Val, and Keyna speaking through her. Healing comes full circle when our children carry the tone of the women who shaped us.

    • Brutus texted a whole list of demands… while at work. 🧐🤷🏽‍♀️

    • Darius seeking Umi duties. 🥰 His way of staying close.

    • Damien, the big brother who shows up—not loudly, but faithfully. 💛 His presence always lifts me.

    Damien and I spent Saturday together—shopping, movies, dinner. I drove him around for a bit. We got home and he immediately started dressing to go out again. I fussed because truly… he only comes to see his barber and his brother.

    Him: “I’ve been with you all day.”

    🤷🏽‍♀️🧐🙄

    #FirstBornJiltsTheHeart

    There’s a sacred sweetness in this stage of life—grown children finding their own paths but still circling back home in their unique ways. Their presence reminds me that love doesn’t leave; it shifts, expands, and deepens. Even the fussing is a kind of prayer.

    Pair all of that with one spoiled pup and I feel surrounded by a living testimony of God’s goodness. 🌿🧡🌿 I’m leaning into these new chapters, not just gracefully—but spiritually aware.

    🍂 Fall is here again. My favorite.

    NC weather gave us every season this week:

    🌦️☔️🌬️❄️☀️

    But today is calm, bright, and warm in that gentle, soul-softening way.

    This morning was #CoffeeAndQuiet and #PrayersAndSage.

    A settling. A centering.

    A reminder of Psalm 46:10 —

    “Be still, and know that I am God.”

    Stillness is not the absence of movement; it is the presence of awareness. It is choosing to pause long enough to hear what your spirit has been whispering all week.

    Today, I’m reminded:

    Healing isn’t optional; it’s required.

    And it often begins in these small, ordinary, holy moments—

    a free cup at Starbucks,

    a child fussing in love,

    a weekend full of familiar voices,

    a quiet home after the laughter settles.

    Happy Sunday, Good People.

    Take care to take care of yourself. 🌿

    Intimately worded,

    Michelle ❤️‍🩹

  • The Wonder of Unfolding:  On the sacred rhythm of  Time, Healing and Autumn’s quiet grace.

    The Wonder of Unfolding: On the sacred rhythm of Time, Healing and Autumn’s quiet grace.

    Sundays have a way of slowing me down enough to notice what time has been doing beneath the surface. The air is crisp, the light shifts, and even the trees seem to know when to release. I am in wonder of how time cloaked our struggles, yet time also reveals the required healing — the necessary strength for us to witness the why’s. In this turning season, I’m reminded that God’s work often happens quietly, layered in moments we don’t yet understand. What once felt delayed was, in truth, unfolding right on time.

    Yesterday, I attended my cousin’s wedding — my second cousin, though I still remember her as the little girl with big dreams and a contagious laugh. Watching her stand there, radiant in hope and grace, marrying again with such genuine love, felt like witnessing time come full circle. The ceremony was outdoors, framed by trees touched with autumn gold, the air soft with both memory and promise.

    At this age, I’m in awe of how love still finds us, how it gathers what’s been scattered by years, by loss, by change. Marriage has a way of reminding us that family expands even as it shifts — that though we’ve said goodbye to parents and grandparents, something sacred continues through us. It’s as if time weaves a quiet thread between what was and what is becoming, inviting us to see how love endures, how it unfolds anew.

    This morning, before I began to write, I recorded a few thoughts — just me, my voice, and the quiet of Sunday. Sunday mornings have become their own kind of prayer for me. Waking up smiling, breathing easier, releasing the heaviness of the work week and the constant pulse of motherhood, I find myself able to go to God in a way that comforts me. There’s peace in that surrender — in remembering I don’t have to hold everything together for the world to keep turning.

    I love my walks, especially now as the leaves start to fall and the air turns brisk. It’s where I feel time most gently — not rushing, not demanding, just moving with me. Each step reminds me that unfolding doesn’t require effort, only willingness. And maybe that’s what this season — this life — continues to teach me: that healing, love, and even time itself are part of a divine rhythm, one that never stops revealing what’s meant to be known in its own perfect moment.

    Rest in knowing that what’s meant for you is already moving toward you. Time, love, and grace are all working together in ways you can’t yet see.

    Be brave,

    Michelle

    ©️Intimately Worded, Michelle.

  • Love Does Not Require My Exhaustion, Only My Honesty

    by Michelle Tillman | Intimately Worded

    There’s a quiet kind of fatigue that can come from wanting to be loved well. It isn’t physical — it’s emotional and spiritual. It’s the weariness that shows up after you’ve overextended your heart just to be understood, after you’ve carried more of the emotional load than the relationship ever asked you to.

    But I’ve come to realize something sacred:

    Love does not require my exhaustion, only my honesty.

    That truth has become a balm for me. Honesty isn’t just about what I say — it’s how I choose to show up. It’s admitting when I’m tired, when I feel unseen, when I’m hoping for more depth. It’s saying, “I want a meaningful relationship,” without trying to earn one through over-effort or performance.

    There’s a kind of peace that only comes when you stop negotiating your needs. When you release the urge to chase clarity or beg for consistency. When you start trusting that the love meant for you will never confuse you, diminish you, or ask you to betray your spirit in the process.

    As we begin to heal with our own stuff, something shifts. We stop seeing love as a rescue and start seeing it as a reflection. We start realizing that the relationships around us mirror where we are internally — what we believe we deserve, how safe we feel within ourselves, and how deeply we’ve allowed grace to meet us in our healing.

    My journey now is about emotional healing and spiritual safety — finding a rhythm in love that doesn’t disrupt my inner calm. I want connection that feels like prayer: steady, honest, rooted in presence. The kind that honors the quiet work I’ve done to heal, forgive, and grow.

    When someone fades away, or blocks, or simply doesn’t have the depth to meet me — I breathe. I remember that peace isn’t the absence of longing; it’s the presence of alignment. I remind myself that my worth doesn’t rise or fall with someone’s ability to recognize it.

    So I’m learning to love differently — without rushing, without rescuing, without rehearsing who I think I need to be. I’m letting honesty, not exhaustion, lead the way.

    Because love that is divine, grounded, and true doesn’t demand my striving.

    It welcomes my stillness. It meets me where I am,

    and says: You are safe here.

    Be Brave,

    Michelle🌿

    “I have found the one whom my soul loves.” — Song of Solomon 3:4

    Intimately Worded | Sunday Reflections

    What would it look like for you to love without exhaustion — to let honesty, not effort, guide your connections?

    SelfLove enables better choices.

    ©️Intimately Worded, Michelle

  • Sundays, Early Mornings & Friendship Loss

    Journey towards Better

    There’s something sacred about early Sundays — before the world fully wakes. It’s where truth sits quietly, waiting to be named.

    I know the world is on fire—

    yet what continues to amaze me is how these global flames mirror our internal ones.

    The ache, the quiet unraveling, the loss that comes not only from tragedy but from truth.

    Humanity feels lost.

    Personal and political beliefs now hold the power to alter the direction of our lives, our connections, even our sense of belonging.

    Recently, I severed a long-term friendship—

    one built on love, laughter, and shared seasons.

    It wasn’t over something petty or misunderstood.

    It was because of politics.

    Not politics as in policy, but politics as in morality.

    People often underestimate the depth of their words or the weight they carry.

    What I’ve learned is this:

    if an apology begins with “I’m not racist” but ends with unwavering support for those who harm and divide—then it isn’t an apology at all.

    It’s an attempt to seek comfort in the very space where harm was done.

    And I’ve decided I don’t have to comfort you through the ending of our friendship.

    My heart is fragile, still healing, still learning.

    But I am also living—intentionally, fully, and with boundaries rooted in love for myself.

    I love deeply, in both length and width.

    But I will not prove that love by tolerating hate, bullying, or dismissiveness disguised as “difference of opinion.”

    “Some endings are not betrayals of love — they are affirmations of self.”

    Sometimes I chuckle, not out of humor, but out of disbelief—

    because people truly forget how long we have been Black and hated.

    How long we’ve known the weight of racism—not as theory, but as lived experience.

    I have felt its ugly claws, tasted its unyielding rage, and recognized how ignorance allows it to thrive.

    And still, on early Sunday mornings, I rise.

    I pray.

    I breathe.

    I choose peace over pretense.

    Friendship loss hurts, especially when love still lingers in memory.

    But truth has a frequency that can’t be silenced, even for comfort’s sake.

    Reflection for the Soul

    This Sunday, take a moment to sit with the quiet after loss.

    Friendship, even when it ends, leaves imprints of who we were — and who we are becoming.

    Ask yourself: What does peace require of me now?

    Not the kind that avoids pain, but the kind that honors it, transforms it, and releases what no longer loves you back.

    May you find grace in your boundaries, rest in your truth,

    and gentleness in the parts of your heart still learning how to heal.

    Intimately worded,

    Michelle 🌿

  • The Eighth Month: A Season of Shifts, Soul Work, and Soft Becoming

    The Eighth Month: A Season of Shifts, Soul Work, and Soft Becoming

    By Michelle Tillman, PsychoTherapist/Founder of Transitional Pathways, PLLC

    Graced for more💕

    August has always felt like a threshold month. The eighth out of twelve, it marks a quiet turning point—a slow descent from summer’s height into something more inward, reflective. The number eight, symbolizing new beginnings and infinite cycles, reminds me that change isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s a whisper, a knowing, a sacred nudge inward.

    This August, I’m paying closer attention.

    I’m noticing how much I’ve grown through the stillness and the storms. Life, love, and relationships—each carry layers of complexity I continue to unpeel, not just as a therapist, but as a Black woman who holds space for others while learning to hold space for myself. Each interaction becomes an opportunity for reflection and growth, revealing deeper truths about my journey and the interconnectedness of our experiences.

    Parenting Through Transitions

    Parenting adult children is its own sacred terrain. There’s a constant balancing act between support and surrender, concern and trust. The role shifts from being a protector to a mirror—from telling them what to do, to showing them who I am becoming. And in that, I’m relearning who I am, too. It’s an intricate dance that requires both courage and vulnerability. As I navigate this evolving relationship, I find myself reflecting on the lessons of patience and grace that I wish to impart. There are days I want to gather them like I used to when they were small, encasing them in the warmth of my love and protection. And there are days when I sit quietly, choosing not to fill the silence, letting them figure it out—letting me figure it out. It’s hard. It’s holy. It’s human, a reminder that growth often comes in layers, revealing more of us in the process.

    The Inner Work of Love

    In love—romantic or otherwise—I’ve stopped striving for clarity at the expense of peace. I’ve learned that deeper connection doesn’t come from figuring someone out but from allowing myself to be fully known, even in uncertainty. Intimacy, for me now, feels less like pursuit and more like permission. The permission to be present, to not shrink, to not pretend I don’t need gentleness. Embracing this vulnerability has deepened my relationships in unexpected ways, fostering a sense of safety and trust that allows us to explore the beautiful complexity of our connections.

    I no longer equate urgency with care. Instead, I ask, Can this connection honor my healing pace? That question alone has brought more clarity than some relationships ever could. It’s taught me the power of setting boundaries and recognizing when a relationship fuels my spirit versus when it drains my energy.

    Spirit-Led Slow Living

    This season, I’ve been deepening my relationship with prayer, meditation, and the quiet art of slowing down. I used to think rest was the reward. Now I know it’s the way. Meditation isn’t always serene. Sometimes it’s tears. Sometimes it’s silence that says, “you’re safe now.” I’ve learned that God often speaks in the pauses between breaths, not just in the outcomes I used to chase. There is a different kind of wisdom that rises when you stop rushing. It invites you to savor life’s moments, to appreciate the beauty in the mundane, and to embrace stillness as a teacher.

    In this letting go of haste, I’ve begun to uncover the richness of my inner landscape—thoughts, feelings, dreams—and allowed them to unfold naturally.

    Holding Space for Myself

    As a therapist, I’ve witnessed transformation in others. But this year, I’ve been asked to be the witness for myself. To name my desires. To grieve what never happened. To celebrate how far I’ve come—even if no one else sees the full stretch. Healing is a personal journey, and each step brings me closer to my authentic self, reminding me that I am not defined by my past, but rather by my resilience.

    August reminds me that healing doesn’t have to be complete to be worthy. I can be tender and powerful. Grieving and grateful. Longing and whole. This dance of contradictions is where I find my strength, my joy, and my truth.

    To You, Reader:

    If you are navigating change—be it in your body, your boundaries, your beliefs—I hope you honor the pauses. I hope you let softness find you. I hope you remember that your pace is not a problem. It’s part of your becoming. Each step along this path is significant, and each moment of reflection is a gift to be cherished.

    Let August be an altar. Not to who you used to be, but to the soul you’re still discovering. Embrace this time of introspection, allowing it to guide you into deeper understanding and appreciation of both yourself and the intricate tapestry of life that connects us all.

    Always, with grace and truth.

    Intimately Worded,

    Michelle

    @TransitionalPathwaysPLLC

    Where healing is sacred and intimacy begins with you.

  • Navigating Relationships and Healing After Loss

    Navigating Relationships and Healing After Loss

    Without Coincidence Divine Timing Connects;

    I am deeply thankful for God’s grace and His provision.

    And in that quietness, I find myself weeping in gratitude. Smiling in reverence. Standing still in awe. God’s grace shows up again and again, sometimes wrapped in joy, sometimes in the hard beauty of becoming. His provision meets me—not always in the ways I expected, but always in the ways I needed.

    I’m learning not just to remember, but to remain—in peace, in presence, in gratitude.

    Spiritual Safety in Grief

    Grief, is a whole something else, entirely– with the loss of my father, can indeed leave us feeling untethered, almost floating, unanchored. This sense of being “lost and free, numb and unable” speaks to the spiritual disequilibrium that can accompany deep loss. When our foundational relationships, like the one with a parent, are altered, it can feel as if a protective covering has been lifted, leaving us exposed in ways we hadn’t anticipated.

    It is incredible how life’s most treasured moments can pass by in the blink of an eye. Recently, I’ve been making a conscious effort to slow things down, to truly embrace and cherish each moment. My memories unfold in slow motion, allowing me to savor them fully. I find myself smiling, shedding tears, and feeling profound gratitude for God’s grace and His continuous provision.

    In these moments of profound vulnerability, cultivating spiritual safety becomes paramount. It’s about recognizing that while earthly anchors may shift, there’s a divine tether that remains. This doesn’t mean bypassing the pain or pretending it doesn’t exist. Instead, it’s about acknowledging the hurt while actively seeking the comfort and stability that spiritual connection can offer.

    My youngest son is 18, a high school graduate, gym rat, and a mental health advocate who is truly walking in his path with empathy and compassion. His friends have their own Bible Study and have given their friendship circle the title of “Council.”

    I am entering what I believe to be one of the greatest relationships of my life…at 54. It’s hitting differently and often feels unfamiliar and fearful. I am in my 50s and dating. Menopause. Diabetes. Dating. My Light, this soft era. None of this is bad; the dating experience is questionable and rather humorous—courageously so. What I know is that it is something worth growing into; it is what my whole soul has craved. Furthermore, it is truly what my father advised me it would be. I was 23 when he told me what qualities to look for in a man, the man for me. I argued that I wouldn’t ever get married; my father passed away the next day.

    This Father’s Day was different than most. It was quiet, filled with grief, and I experienced the loss of him with deeper sadness and more love. #Grateful His impact on my life carries me. I transitioned from being protected and covered to a different type of sheltering. He was my anchor, my fallback. It’s hard to navigate this life without a father. Our selves become untethered, almost floating and unanchored. Lost and free. Numb and unable.

    Where would I be, truly, if God didn’t redirect his heart? I’m an adopted child, a loved daughter and at times I truly believe a cherished sibling. Family is our first love…be it what it is or what it was. ❤️‍🩹

    There are not too many people I share my heart with; I believe that to be a good thing. I am sharing how off kilter I have been lately with my sister-friend. Her presence in my life is actionable, tangible. My friend, my Wizard Sister said to me, “We lived for so long in isolation in so many ways…individual traumas, collective traumas and now we’re all in the early stages of reconnection getting triggered left and right (zero pun intended and…) We hurt in relationships and we heal in relationships. I am praying for your healing, sister.” @borninprovidence 🌿

    I breathe. She’s right. Foolishly yet with wisdom—thinking I thought I was healed enough; just enough. I have been doing the work, my soul work for the longest. It would seem that falling into something safe and prayed for would be simple, easier, refreshing… my heart yearns for soft, softer a forever landing.

    I encourage you to not only look up in wonderment yet learn to count the stars. Scripture Psalms 147:4 states, “He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name.”

    God’s infinite wisdom and limitless love continues to pull all of this together and not as haphazardly as we believe. Trust that purpose and pain is not the great divide we experience, yet somehow it bridges what has to happen. Love better. Love anyway. Do it because you can; you are ready.

    Intimately Worded, 

    ~Michelle

  • Unlearning; God is in the details.

    I no longer am game to run on empty, to love on fumes. Inadvertently, we have learned to produce, busy ourselves on empty. Our moms did it as well as our grandmothers; we learned by observation, what we saw The Village doing. Women, we consume what we think works best for us, (as individuals) when we are often the nucleus of our families. Hardly a soft-landing. Scratching my head, it seems the middle of things is the hardest part of this journey. I have learned that it is not the beginning nor the newness that is the most difficult. My personal statement for 2023 continues to pop up consciously: #intentionalgrace…I’m not feeling graced nor graceful these last few months and all is not terrible. I’m leaning more into the flux of my creativity, sitting with the faithfulness and the stillness of things.

    I’m reflective, conscientious in showing up in the difficult places and I’m happy; things truly are falling into blessed places, making room for intricate spaces. I am able to identify the external factors of my lapse in not flowing with my creative abilities. I readily identify my emotions and process the nudges, the whispers…I’m attune with my intuition. I am able to recognize the internal and soulful things that push me off kilter, off my structure for cultivating peace. I am also self-aware, I love being my way through and acknowledging my yearning for “stillness.”

    Big, big things are happening in this world and those big things are heart wrenching and at times unyielding. I’m learning to answer those whispers to call, to reach out to others. I smile when I hear their joy in hearing my voice. I’m learning to hear, to listen to reciprocate and to want as much as I give out. Love seems to be so far removed from all the new things, new ways, new this, new that. What I know, strength is love; love is strength. Remain mindful of the good things, of good people…we’re all trying to find our way.

    My prayers: “May I not settle in my disappointments, Heavenly Father.”

    Be encouraged: “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” — Hebrews 12:11

    Intimately Worded,

    Michelle

    https://www.buymeacoffee.com/IntimatelyWrded

  • July: Healing Humanity

    Our 2020 has gut punched seemingly on a weekly basis. I’m proud of how we’ve endured and persevered. WordPress sent me a congratulatory notification two days ago stating that I have been blogging for 5 years now. Wow! I am appreciative for the courage to share my thoughts in such a creative process. Thank you to all who like, follow, share and comment. I value each of you.

    This year has had me in such a weird place that writing seems foreign to me. I haven’t been neglectful in writing—there just doesn’t seem to be an easy flow of writing to where readers will be empathetic to comprehend my soul pieces. I hope that makes sense. The political disconnect (truthfully it has always been there), CoVid19 continues, Systemic Racism (woundedly, it remains), Police Murders of Black Lives (#GeorgeFloyd) was not the first and the revolutionary resurgence of Black Movement. #BlackLivesMatter

    #Spiritual Wellness…I made major moves this week. I’m doing a lot more focusing on the things I want and requesting those things that I require. I expected some push back on this one request and I didn’t receive it. In a talk w/ a colleague, “Michelle I’m not sure why you expected push back. You are the most sought out therapist here. Look at your location. Every location I visit you’re the only therapist that remains booked. Yeah. No, you’re not going to get any push back.” 

    I looked at her strangely. I didn’t get the big head. I became even more humbled. There are times I have no clue where I am in all this. Oftentimes, I miss me. This week was a Monday’s Monday–every day of the week: I listened to a patient apologize yet defend their idea of “All Lives Matter while Black Lives do not matter.” (Actual words: “Black Lives do not matter.”) The more they talked to their Black Female Therapist, the more racist they sounded. I wrote three individuals out of work—mental health has become an issue for the majority; I was threatened “jokingly” while in session and I reported my first case of child abuse to DSS.

     This ‘work” just doesn’t leave me yet it doesn’t become a part of me either. It all causes me to pause and reflect. I move into gratefulness. I think who I am and how I am leads me toward the moments of difficulty, gives me strength and causes me to recognize where my strength comes from. I think if  I had the ability to shake it or become numb I wouldn’t be who I am as a therapist. I believe serving as a therapist has to be one of the most difficult things I had to do…and become. We’re always becoming, evolving; trying to be better than yesterday. This role as therapist is difficult while being purposefully rewarding; so many pieces of me are required. 

    In my personal reflection, I notice how we neglect ourselves to make ourselves available for other people. One previous Saturday, I woke up unsure if I was getting sick or if I was just worn out–mentally and physically. I was more apt to believe in the first option, that I was getting sick. In wearing these masks my face has begun to breakout, coupled w/ stress I think it’s natural to assume illness. I needed to rest and reset. I’m going to find my space in this. I’m committed to finding my space in this. I continue to make room everyday as well as set new boundaries. I am selfish with my peace.

    I pray that in our moments —those moments that we find difficult to get up that we move towards our wholeness. As we continue to be whole there is no stopping point of movement, of increase. We gain ground. Continue to gain ground. In your grounding: you may have to Reground, Reframe, Reset, Process, Breathe…Love Anyway. 

    Intimately Worded,

    Michelle

  • Graced For More

    Committing to writing has always been an adventurous discipline for me. Forgive me for not posting as quickly as my experiences occur. I am ever so grateful for the way Life is treating me and faithfully attuned to how God stands in the gaps of my unknowing.

    August, my birthday month has been revolutionary! My 49th year began with decisions, doubts and quiet fear. Those things I kept to myself, internalizing the eternal. My last post I detailed my journey in participating in #31DaysOfPrayer; which generated a great deal of evolving. The Spiritual growth process is unusual and unique, rather intimate. My spiritual life has been enlightening, very different than assumed. We’re all given foundations, taught standards and one or several events will set us on a meta trajectory with our own beliefs changing and/or becoming more.

    I gifted myself a spa treatment. I’ve never had one before and expected service like that of a standard massage treatment. My time there was/is unequivocally a required life-essential. The care I received increased my strength in becoming better in my love of self—acknowledging the existence of how I’ve allowed abuse, sadness and humanness cause a permanence of take-aways.

    The outside doesn’t appear as much to look at yet the facility is tranquil once you enter. How do you treat yourself? Is the first question prompted within the waiting area. I was greeted with warmth, kindness and served Watermelon Basil Water. #fancy I chose the Summer Scrub Treatment followed by a facial treatment. Yes, I still have acne!! Which blows my mind for I never had acne issues as a teen or during pregnancy.

    I’m directed to this beautiful room where water is running slowly in a copper tin tub. The room is soft, full of earthy colors: browns, creamy white and greenery. I’ve yet to relax. There’s a great deal of anxiety even with expecting this type of care.

    The process was gentle. The care exceptional. I’ve never been cared for in such a manner. #Sisters, we serve everyone. We are nurturers. It’s what we do, how we are. As I explained to my eldest: “My first 7 years I cannot remember but no one has ever washed me. Ever. I’ve taken care of others, washed and massaged them. No one has ever cared for me in such a way. It solidified that I want to be wealthy with life. I want to be able to do those type things for myself.”

    Him: “It must be hard for you. To know that you were never loved in that manner. I mean I can’t remember but I know that I was cared for in that way because you tell me. Grandma told me. I know I was loved, am loved. But to know that you were not. Man, Momma. You should be able to do that at least 2x a year.”


    My attendant requested permission to wash my stomach…4 babies, 6 surgeries, numerous stretch marks, c-sect scar, weight gain…I cried, silently. Every negative thing, thought, image was lifted away from me. How shameful I’ve treated myself. It’s all connected—our mental, physical, spiritual and emotional health. Soul-neglecting has to be our greatest betrayal of self. How unknowingly cruel we are, can be.

    As I returned back into my work week, I experienced some soreness, tenderness when I moved. Not painful but just enough to remember the experience as it transpired. We’re not here to just touch others’ lives, to serve others. Be mindful of how you’re representing your soul. We’re not created to take in everything and hold on to it. How are you treating yourself?

    Don’t confuse self-care with maintenance, those things we do to maintain a “finished” look. I am uncomfortable yet grounded…forging and purged…leveling up. I’m unsettled in settling. That makes my soul smile. {Ecclesiastes 3}

    #BeAWholeMovement

    “Trust me when I say, You’re capable of anything imaginable.” ~Anonymous

    Intimately Worded,

    Michelle